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; living life backwards while moving forward

A year of inactiveness

it’s not something new that I’ve left this space untouched for a long time but I just realised it’s been close to a year. I can’t say there’s nothing worth penning down because there is SO much or rather TOO much that has happened over 2016. maybe I should at least pen down my wedding planning journey so that one day, I can read back and judge how much a bridezilla I’ve been. maybe.. just maybe….. :’D

Record high


it’s merely the 2nd month of the new year and i’ve consumed 4 days of my medical leave. been feeling quite under the weather recently which makes me wonder what have happened to my ever-strong immunity system. not a record that i was proud to break though. hopefully the antibiotics this time round can keep me healthy for the rest of the year. CNY’s over in a flash… 2016, please be good. (:

Last of 2015

I think the problem with me is that I don’t like to tell people what I’m thinking (or expecting) sometimes. Then I get upset when they don’t do what I’m expecting them to do. Then I keep it to myself and get sad by myself, with myself. I know we are all not effing mind readers, but I just don’t get why I am like that. Maybe that’s something to change in the coming 2016. So much to reflect on for the past year yet I haven’t found time and energy to really pen it down. Guess it’s not in my list of priorities after all. This year marks a couple of life-changing moments and I’m grateful for everyone who has been part and involved in my life. 

Last few hours of 2015 and am pissed with the persistent headache that has bugged me since last night. Then again, shall shake this negativity off me and welcome the new year with a smile! Hoping countdown at work with my happy bunch of colleagues would make me happier later. 

Anyhows, GOODBYE 2015 AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR 2016!

Engaged

my first bouquet of flowers from the man; this birthday is, by far, the most memorable. although not 100% surprised, I am still very very touched that everything that I like (colors, numbers, etc) were incorporated into this special moment. and so, I am on my way to becoming a MRS now! feels weird to change saying “my boyfriend” to “my fiance” but yup, I’ll get used to it! 😉

Sometimes 

Sometimes, you just reach a point when you don’t know what you’re doing anymore. No idea what’s the purpose of doing anything at all. Guess I hit this point again today. Was trying to search for some inspiration and motivation when I came across this article – Read here.

Sometimes when you’re trying to reach a goal, it’s impossible to connect the dots where you currently are. Somehow you just have to trust in yourself, and have faith that you will reach your dreams, despite not having the slightest clue or perfectly laid out road to where you are going. Nobody can connect the dots looking forward; you only can connect them when you’re looking backwards. You have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in the future; you have to trust in something, whether it’s karma or destiny, but trusting yourself is the first step towards feeling inspired and having the motivation to move forward.

And that’s a paragraph that I find really true. So yup, shall trust. 

Flashback 

just happened to click into this link which I probably have long forgotten about. then I realised it’s been a while since I penned down any thoughts. I used to do it everyday on a separate blog during trainings. mostly on training updates but I guess I did include my daily thoughts every now and then too. well, that site is still pretty much classified though. and so are the thoughts.. doubt there’s anything even interesting for other people to read about anyway..

random thoughts..

Personality

It’s been quite a while since I did a personality test. Suddenly, I am curious if my Myers-Briggs Personality Type is still the same. So, I went to google and took the first test that came out. So spent a few minutes answering the questions to the best that I can and got my result as an INFJ. Now the problem is.. I don’t remember what I used to be. How clever, huh?

Anyway, is it true that our personality changes over time? Or do we stay the same even after years of living in this world, in this ever-changing life? I wonder…

Year of the Goat

happy CNY from #quekyee! anyways, this year seems a little off from the usual CNY mood. maybe because of all the holidays I had prior to work, plus work just officially started. well, technically, I haven’t exactly started too but working shifts has been screwing with my body clock. gotta get used to it soon. (:

Anger management

it’s true when they say never to say anything or argue in a fit of anger because you tend to be irrational and do things that you might afterwards regret. i have to admit i still have trouble managing my anger and will put words in a much worse state than i originally meant. for that, i’d like to apologize to whoever i’ve offended from my choice of words, especially the person i’ve quarrelled with today. and i have to admit social media is a very powerful tool which can let words/thoughts travel to thousand others within seconds. i’m sorry for any hurt i’ve caused in the course of my explosion of anger and pissedoff-ness. it’s the (chinese) new year soon. can’t wait for a new beginning, far from all the unhappiness!

PS: i just realised i’ve had another post with the same title. lol.

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