pretense?

feels like i just been through a really packed week, with birthday celebrations and work. funnily, this two items cancel off each other in monetary terms. *laughs* on another note, been having one of a mixed emotion lately. hate to admit but i can’t exactly deny how much i’m hurting. i thought i’ve begun to feel a little lesser, care very much lesser and all but nah.. apparently i haven’t.. i’m still affected, very much. but probably not as much as before as i’ve come to see a bigger picture now. buddy was telling me how predictable i was which really makes me wonder how i can make myself less of that.. then again, that wouldn’t be me already, would it? times like this.. i can’t figure who i should turn to. i know i shouldn’t be inclined. but, who’s to say who made me that way? what is the fairest option? which is the right path to take? i ponder on….

old habits die hard.
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