sometimes, if you don’t feel IN place, you’ve no motivation to continue at all. i’m really getting tired of all these responsibilities. it’s like, i’m starting to think i’m there for the sake of being there, not because i want to be there. do you see how pointless it is? i wish i could just let go & heck it all but i don’t want to be labeled “irresponsible”. and then again, i feel that there are others more suitable for this appointment, this position, this place i’m trying hard to fit into..
anyways, talking about decisions, i sincerely hope i won’t regret this. contract signed, cheque written; the last few steps will be to find an envelope, put all those documents in, write the address, attach a stamp, and dump it into the post box. then, bid farewell to Nikon in a month’s time and say hello to the most undesirable school which i’ve always dreaded getting into – SIM.
but well, i still want to believe that my results should have earned me a place in the BIG 3 because ah tian says so too! *laughs* blame it on the competition this year or the courses i chose but since i didn’t get in, i shall just accept fate and not waste time trying fruitlessly for it. in any case, i’m going to work hard so wish me all the best to getting that ‘square hat’ 8 days after my 21st birthday! (: