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; living life backwards while moving forward

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Ziddy

Convince

most of the time, the hardest thing to do is
to convince myself.

some things are indeed important while some things really shouldn’t matter. exams are the priorities now; any other plans or thoughts or whatsoever CAN wait. but, saying is so easy; doing is hard. i just hate the feeling of not being firm enough to do command my heart to follow my mind. i detest the feeling of thinking of all the whatever would have been, should have been or is going to be.. maybe for starters, i should just get away and isolate myself, away from the internet and place full concentration on the notes. hopefully by not searching, not trying, not looking, not guessing, not wondering, not knowing and not waiting, things will be better. WELL, so if i don’t blog for the next couple of days, it’ll mean that i’ve successfully convinced myself. hur. till then, we shall see..

on a side note, sometimes going to work is also a form of releasing stress. just, spare me from all the difficult customers tmr please! i’m going to pamper myself and gain some weight for the last time before exams commence in 4 days’ time.. (:

但愿我不会再想念你…
0

Squeezing time

♫ i want to break free ♫

with sis at home. had a pretty packed day. well, actually just two things on my list but they already drained off all my energy. i reckon i’ll go to bed soon after finishing up this post. have been sleeping real early these days. well, not the 10pm kind but usually just minutes after the clock strikes 12am. used to be able to stay up till 3 or 4am yet not feeling a bit of tiredness. probably, what i’m experiencing now is more normal..

of mugging and couz’s birthday..

0

11 hours

getting gossipy.

i was in school at 8.40am today, stayed all the way till about 8pm and guess what.. those were the ONLY things i wrote on my notes. 11 bloody hours and that’s how much i did. okay, minus two hours i spent going to debrief and meetings, i still get myself stuck at like a page for more than 3 hours. i seriously am so screwed for ethics. i just can’t treat it like a story book and pretend i can understand the whole damn theories. guess buddy is starting to see the fidgety and cranky part of me. i just hate feeling so helpless. ):

on a side note..

0

Mind or matter

kindness, bring it on!

i think the little girl on the Singapore Kindness Movement TVC is uber adorable. the innocent face and sweet smile just melts my heart each time i see the commercial. *laughs* anyways, i’m a happy girl today because the bus arrived as soon as i reached the bus stop when i was going home! you know, it only happens probably once in every hundred times. hahaha.

“because those who matters won’t mind and those who minds, won’t matter..”

the above was supposed to be a quote from Red Thread but i can’t rmb the exact words used; just thought it made quite a good sense. anyhow, glenn, vernetta and flying dutchman never fails to make me smile sillily to myself. nowadays i feel like waking up early just to listen to their show. how i wished they can host it at a later timing. oh, and the way they commented about the actors/actresses of the two shows i watched last night is really LOL.

start it, share it, show it.
0

1.5 hours

9 more days.

i love colours and i love sweet stuffs. pretty and yummy biscuits were the lunch snack during mugging times with buddy today. anyways, i can’t figure what’s wrong with me this semester. the motivation to get up early, chop a good table to mug mug mug till the sun sets isn’t there anymore; the drive to write my own tidy colourful notes each time exams are near isn’t there anymore too. i just feel so screwed for almost ALL the modules this semester. but well, as if it helps, the desire to maintain my GPA is still there. hahah..

show time.

8

Of sins

happy 21st to JULIANA dearest and AMELIA pretty!

today’s lesson on IQ, EQ and refraining oneself from talking behind people’s back was a good one. it made me feel guilty for awhile that i kinda saw a need to put a fullstop to it. but sorry, i sinned again. i guess maybe, just maybe it’s still impossible to not gossip at all. well, or maybe it’s just not an easy task for me. *laughs out loud* whenever i see something, i just feel the need to share and talk about it. LOL. but i promise, i will cut down. at least, i will try…

PS: mugging shall officially start tmr. no more procrastinating. enough of dramas, theme hospital and L4D. i had enough of them all today. and i shall not stuck myself onto a new show until after exams. (:

facebook is such a good avenue, still.
2

Of webcam

mugging hard?

and that’s what makes a boring mugging day less boring. sis was playing with her webcam in front of me, so i decided to join in. guess we both looked too chui without make up? hahah, cos somehow, when i couped these photos from her blog, they are all photoshopped already. maybe i should try to steal the originals to post on facebook. *laughs* in any case, selected few to illustrate how bored we both were..

webcam craze.

4

Hopelessly

wanted to know.

they were supposed to be my source of motivation. but yes, with the words “were supposed”, it simply meant they weren’t; at least, not today. probably choosing to stay home was a bad choice. was too tired thus i decided to give the trip to school a miss, and happily dreamt my way till 12pm. took out the pens, textbook, notes and paper but they have been left untouched right in front of me for 8 hours now. spent the entire time watching dramas and playing theme hospital. sighs. where’s the sense of urgency?! ):

in denial.
4

Plentiful smiles

look away.

finally, attended the very last lecture of the semester. but well, somehow all the lecturers this semester are quite stingy with their tips. so yup, i reckon studying is gonna be pretty hard this time round. anyways, headed to bugis with babe and went to visit the newly opened iluma. it’s so gigantic but pretty lifeless because i guess too little people know of its existence. one good thing would be the movies i guess. filmgarde is like using price penetration, $6 for all movies, all times. (:

food, shop, movies.

6

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